Yet, every single one of the issues raised below transpired at this year's Lunacon (either to me directly or as reported to me by people I know and trust or loudly in the same room I was in), often more than once, and it's just simply not okay.
To be clear, I blame none of this on the con staff or organizers, who continue to be lovely and gracious people. Nor is this directed at my friends old and new from this year's event.
With that in mind, consider this an open letter, that I will no doubt be adding to over the next few days.
1. Cons are crowded.
2. Cons attract diverse audiences, including members of the LGBTQA community.
3. Cons attract diverse audiences, including people of different relationship styles.
4. Cons attract diverse audiences, including people living with disabilities.
5. Cons attract diverse audiences, including people of a wide range of ethnic, racial and religious backgrounds.
6. Cons attract people of all shapes and sizes.
7. While in many ways cons have different standards of behavior than other social events and groupings:
8. An explanation for inappropriate behavior does not excuse it. An explanation does not absolve you of saying sorry, nor give you permission not to attempt to learn from your mistakes.
9. Do not hover on the edges of a conversation you are not a part of for thirty minutes! Either interject relevantly in an attempt at social networking or go away. Understand that you are not entitled to anyone's time, but that it is also reasonable to expect people to be gracious with you, even if they do not wish to engage in discussion with you.
10. The hotel staff are people with jobs. They are not your servants, slaves, or sex-toys, nor are they robots or other objects without feeling. RESPECT THE HOTEL EMPLOYEES (and tip the housekeeping staff).
11. If you are on a panel you are obligated to prepare for it. This goes doubly for panel moderators.
12. If you are attending a panel be a courteous audience member.